Building an optimal skin

Why do people come for therapy?

Building an optimal skin

I’m not talking about our physical skin, rather our psychological skin, although the metaphor is very apt. We talk of people being thin skinned or thick skinned. What does this mean, and what can we do about it?

Why do we need a ‘skin’

To live safely and comfortably in the world we need a skin around our precious essential self. This skin should allow in things we want, keep out things we don’t, let us express what we wish to and protect us from over expression.

How do we form our ‘skin’

Our skin is formed in childhood in response to the interactions we experience from our caregivers. In an ideal world we would form an optimal skin, but sometimes we form a thin skin, sometimes a thick skin and worst of all, a chaotic skin.


It’s never too late to build an optimal skin.

It’s one of the things we can work on together in therapy.

Watch the two minute explainer below.

And by the way, you don't need to wait for a crisis.

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